Hello Kimby, I'm back again with a new critique.
Vision: 5 stars. Because the whole fiction is extremely pleasurable to read and enjoy; the characters are well-developped and I think that the descriptions you provided for each character might be close to truth. But of course this is only my opinion, I may be wrong.
Originality: 5 stars. You already know how I truly hate philosophy; the 'Qualia' trick adds more sense to the general plot of 'language' and the duo 'feelings/sensations'. It is a good explanation not only in real life but also to a better comprehension of the characters' inner world. And you made me love philosophy only for a brief moment, so this is a miracle
Technique: 5 stars. The switch between Dero's speech towards the bar crowd and his story-telling is clear and makes the story more interesting. I also appreciated very much the little confusion about Richard telling Dero how he made love to Till for the first time :3 but after a few lines everything was clearer again. :3
Impact: 5 stars. The alphabetical order is awesome; every single letter gives you a little story, which, combined to the others, create a universe of sensations, shared language, sounds, feelings, appreciation, and devotion. And also the beginning with 'Alpha' and the end with 'Omega' end the cycle perfectly.
How couldn't I have given you 5 stars for each point, you being the most gifted writer I ever met in my life?
Be sure that with me, you will always have 5 stars for each point in the critique
Many thanks again for this wonderful birthday gift; I loved and appreciated every single word and comma